Are You Really Best Friends? The Ultimate Guide to Knowing if Your Friendship is Built to Last

Have you ever wondered if that person you call your “best friend” really deserves the title? Most of us have had a friendship that seemed rock-solid, only to realize it was lacking in some key areas. So how do you know if someone truly qualifies as a BFF?

Making and keeping great friends is one of life's greatest joys. But best friendships take work too. They require trust, loyalty, laughter, and sometimes, forgiveness.

In this post, we'll explore the unique ingredients that bond best friends for the long haul. You'll learn ways to strengthen your closest connections and spot signs it may be time to redefine a friendship.

What Makes Someone Best Friend Material?

What transforms an ordinary friend into a best friend? Hallmark movie marathons and BFF necklaces aside, here are the key qualities that define real besties:

1. A Best Friend Knows the Real You

Casual acquaintances only see the surface version of you. But your bestie has full access behind the curtain. They know your quirks, flaws, secrets, dreams and deepest insecurities. Yet they love you anyway.

You don't feel the need to censor yourself or pretend around a best friend. You can share your weirdest thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment. That's freeing.

2. They're Your Go-To Person in a Crisis

When an emergency strikes, who's the first person you think to call? If it's your bestie, that's a telling sign. You know they'll be there for you no matter what.

In scary or stressful times, a best friend provides an emotional anchor. They'll rush to your side, listen without interrupting, and help you get through it.

3. You Can Go Weeks Without Talking - And Pick Up Right Where You Left Off

The best friendships can endure long silences. You don't need to text every day or see each other weekly to stay close.

No matter how much time passes, reconnecting feels natural. Your bond transcends mundane check-ins. You pick up right where you left off and feel at home together.

Looking back, you can pinpoint pivotal moments and phases you went through together. You've witnessed each other's highs and lows firsthand over the years.

That shared history bonds you. You laugh about memories only the two of you understand. Flashbacks transport you right back to the moment.

5. Loyalty and Trust Run Bone-Deep

Solid best friends would take a bullet for each other. You can trust them with your life - and never worry they'll betray your confidence.

True besties remain loyal even when you have conflicts. The connection overrides temporary tiffs or misunderstandings. You know they always have your back.

6. Laughter Comes Easy

What's the surest sign of real friendship? The ability to laugh hysterically together until you snort and tear up.

With a best friend, inside jokes fly fast and free. You can be your silliest selves. Your senses of humor perfectly align, making every get-together a blast.

7. You Forgive Each Other's Flaws

Here's a friendship truth: nobody's perfect. Even besties mess up sometimes. One may be forgetful, another chronically late.

But real best friends forgive each other's shortcomings. You see their flaws as part of a complete package - just more pieces of them to accept and love.

8. You Can Be Totally, Comfortably Yourself

Let your guard down. Ditch the filters. Toss the pretense. That's how it feels to be with your ride-or-die bestie.

Around your BFF, you can fully relax and bask in their unconditional acceptance. No wonder you jump at chances to hang out!

12 Fun Activities for Best Friends to Strengthen Your Bond

Now that you know the hallmarks of true best friendship, let's talk fun ways to nurture that priceless bond!

1. Reminisce Over Old Photos Together

Thumb through old yearbooks, albums or camera rolls. Laugh over awkward phases, cringey fashion choices and memorable milestones you passed together. Taking a nostalgia trip is a great bonding experience.

2. Recreate Your Childhood Sleepovers

Build a pillow fort, watch your favorite childhood movies, play Truth or Dare, prank call people...relive the magic! Bring back the silly traditions you shared at childhood sleepovers.

3. Plan a Weekend Getaway

Escape to a new place just for fun. Explore somewhere you've both been dying to visit. Trying new activities and making memories in fresh surroundings brings you closer.

Take a pottery workshop. Learn to salsa dance. Brush up your Spanish. Exploring a new hobby side-by-side deepens your bond. You'll have insider jokes from the class for years to come.

5. Hit a Museum Neither of You Have Visited

Wandering through exhibits gives you uninterrupted time together to chat about art, culture, history or whatever comes to mind!

6. Go On a Nostalgic Food Crawl

Visit old haunts from childhood or college together - the pizza place, diner, ice cream shop, bar or coffeehouse. The comfort of familiar tastes in meaningful places feels special.

7. Do DIY Spa Treatments at Home

Give each other facials, pedicures, and de-stressing massages. Light candles, burn incense, play relaxing music. Ahhh.

8. Visit a Psychic or Get Tarot Readings Together

See what's in store for you, solo and as a duo! Comparing notes on your fortune teller's impressions is guaranteed to get laughs.

9. Hit Up a Karaoke Bar

Belt out your favorite empowerment anthems together! Don't take it too seriously - half the fun is butchering songs. You'll create priceless memories.

10. Go On a Hike Somewhere Scenic

Being surrounded by the beauty of nature is rejuvenating. Take pictures at scenic overlooks, pack a picnic, soak up the sweeping views.

11. Recreate "Best Friend" Moments from Movies

Hold boomboxes over your heads, paint each other's portraits, dance around in underwear & glasses...try out iconic BFF movie scenes!

12. Time Capsule

Gather mementos and letters for each other. Seal them in a container to unearth years later when you need a smile.

When Best Friends Become More - Or Less

The ebb and flow of life means friendships change. Besties may drift apart or even have a falling out. On the flip side, platonic besties sometimes shift to romance. Here's how to navigate transitions.

What If You're Growing Apart?

If you sense a best friendship slipping away, don't ignore it. Have an honest heart-to-heart about what you both want and need. You may realize you've simply outgrown the relationship.

But often, life just gets in the way. Priorities like work, families or partners crowd out friends. Discuss ways to be more present and actively nurture your bond.

If it becomes clear the gap is irreparable, do your best to part on good terms. Honor the friendship that shaped your life, then move forward.

Can Best Friends Successfully Date?

In romantic comedies, friends-to-lovers is a common trope. And it does happen in real life too. But proceeding with caution is wise.

Before anything, gauge if you both genuinely want to date - it's not just convenient or comfortable. Speak up early before deeper feelings arise.

If you try dating and it goes south, it can wreck the friendship. So only risk it if you're sure the potential payoff outweighs that possibility.

How Do You Break Up With a Toxic Best Friend?

Painful as it is, sometimes you have to end unhealthy friendships. Look for patterns like:

Chronic criticism, passive aggression, guilt trips or manipulation
Betrayals of trust
Repeated boundary violations
Self-centered behavior
Lack of empathy
Competitiveness or jealousy

Have a direct talk laying out your concerns and suggesting changes. If no progress results, clearly but compassionately explain you need distance.

Can Ex-Best Friends Reconcile?

With time and changed perspectives, some friend breakups resolve organically. To mend fences:

Suggest meeting just to catch up, no pressure
Listen without getting defensive
Validate their feelings/viewpoint
Take responsibility for your role
Ask what they need to rebuild trust
Discuss changes you've made
Don't force it if they need more space

Healing rifts takes humility. But recovered best friendships can be sweeter than ever.

Signs Your Friendship Is Becoming platonic - Not Best

Do you ever get the sense someone you call a "best friend" is just a regular pal? Subtle clues include:

They only open up on a surface level
Your texts go mostly unanswered
Hanging out always feels like a low priority
They don't really "get" your quirky humor
Your connection relies on partying or gossiping
They flake often or leave you hanging
Inside jokes and memories don't pile up

If a friendship stays stuck at a superficial social level for long, it may be time to re-classify it. See if having an open chat changes things. If not, pull back your time and emotional investment. Invest that energy into bonds with more mutual understanding and priority instead.

How to Make New Best Friends as an Adult

Childhood besties know your longest history, but people change tremendously over time. Adulthood brings chances to meet kindred spirits who truly get the person you are now.

Actively nurture new connections that feel easy and meant-to-be. Here's how to find best friend potential as a grownup:

Bond over hobbies like hiking groups or pottery classes
Chat up a cool coworker you vibe with
Say yes to happy hours and dinner parties
Reach out to old acquaintances you want to know better
Try Bumble BFF to find friends by interests
Adopt a dog - fellow dog parents make great pals!

Put yourself out there and be open. When you click with someone, suggest spending more one-on-one time together. Gradually deepen the relationship and it may blossom into a wonderful new best friendship.

Long Distance Best Friend Tips

In our mobile world, childhood besties often end up states apart. While geographic separation poses challenges, your bond can thrive across the miles when you:

Schedule regular video chat dates
Send snail mail care packages full of inside jokes
Meet up for vacations in places halfway between you
Play online games together
Have movie nights through apps like Scener or Metastream
Send gifts like doorbell cameras so you can see each other's families
Text and tag each other in memes constantly

The emotional connection with a lifelong best friend overrides physical distance. With intention and creativity, your BFF bond can be unshakeable whether you live 5 miles or 500 miles apart.

Are You Really Best Friends?

Relationships as close as best friends are precious. While the path won't always be smooth, true besties are worth fighting for.

Stay present. Forgive generously. Laugh loudly. Make memories. Get through hard times together. When a friendship stands on unbreakable pillars of trust and loyalty, it can weather anything.

Here's to nurturing the bonds that make life brighter - with those who know and love every piece of your story. When you've found those friends, hold onto them tight.

So what do you think - is your closest confidante a true best friend? How have you strengthened that priceless relationship over time? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

Frequently Asked Questions About Best Friendships

Having a BFF comes with its own set of ups, downs, and universal growing pains. Check out some common questions people have about navigating their most treasured bonds.

1. What are some fun things best friends can do together?

Great question! Besties who want to nurture their bond should make time for adventures that let them laugh hysterically together. Try a karaoke night, museum visit, weekend road trip, or trampoline park. Reminisce over old photos or make new memories at familiar hangouts from your past. Get active with yoga, rock climbing, or paddleboarding dates. Overall, choose activities you both love that hold special meaning in your relationship. Those inside jokes will keep you giggling for years.

2. How often do best friends need to talk or see each other?

There's no magic frequency that works for every friendship. The healthiest bestie bonds are flexible. You shouldn't need to text every single day or see each other weekly necessarily. True best friends can go extended periods without communication and still pick up right where they left off. But do make an effort to stay updated on big events and be present for emotional support during hard times. Checking in more often by phone or video chat can help you avoid losing touch when life gets busy. As long as you maintain emotional intimacy and open communication channels, your friendship can thrive at its own pace.

3. What do you do when you have a fight with your best friend?

Even the most rock-solid besties sometimes have conflicts. Little tiffs are usually no big deal. But for more serious fights, actively repairing the relationship is important. Be the bigger person and initiate a conversation to clear the air. Avoid accusations. Instead, explain how the situation made you feel using "I" statements. Listen without defensiveness as your friend shares their side. Take responsibility for any role you played. If apologies are warranted, offer them sincerely. Finally, talk constructively about how to avoid future conflicts and recommit to supporting each other. With compromise and maturity, you can bounce back stronger.

4. How do you make new best friends as an adult?

Great question! Many adults struggle to make meaningful new friendships outside of college or school environments. But it's definitely possible if you're open and put yourself out there. Try connecting with people at work or in hobby groups, clubs, places of worship, or volunteer activities. Accept invitations and say yes to social events where you could meet potential kindred spirits. Apps like Bumble BFF can also connect you with like-minded people looking for friends. When you click with someone new, suggest hanging one-on-one. Gradually deepen the relationship by sharing more about your lives, families, hopes, and quirky interests. Investing time is key - soon, a new bestie might emerge!

5. Can you date or marry your best friend?

This one's tricky! Occasionally friendships do progress into romance, especially in movie plots. Sometimes it can work amazingly, and your best friend becomes your partner for life. But jumping into dating or marriage with a platonic bestie comes with big risks too. If it ends badly, you'll likely lose the friendship forever. Before taking that leap, have honest talks to confirm you both want to try a romantic relationship, not just out of convenience. Ensure you're truly attracted to each other as more than friends. If you decide to become more than friends, take it very slowly. Easing into dating without high expectations can help minimize damage to the friendship if you change your minds. But once feelings get deeper, you may reach a point of no return.

6. How do you stay close with a long distance best friend?

When physical distance threatens to cool a bestie bond, taking action is key. Schedule regular phone, text, or video chat sessions to stay up to date. Send each other care packages full of inside jokes and favorite treats. Meet up for in-person visits whenever possible. Share pics and tag one another on social media constantly so you still feel part of each other's day-to-day lives. Watch movies or play games in real time through apps. Snail mail letters and postcards are more meaningful than texts. Most importantly, communicate openly about your need to nurture your lifelong bestie bond despite the geographic challenge. With a little planning and effort, you can stay as close as ever!

7. What if you grow apart from your best friend?

As sad as it feels, growing apart from a best friend is a natural part of life changes. Priorities shift, personalities evolve, and interests diverge. But first have an honest conversation about the friendship. Ask if they've also noticed you two drifting. Discuss any issues that need airing or behavior changes that could help rekindle your bond. If that's unsuccessful, accept that some friendships are better left in the past with gratitude for the meaningful role they once played. Maintain mutual respect, wish them well, and direct your energy into current relationships that better fit who you are now. Growing apart doesn't erase positive past memories. Hold onto those, and embrace new chances to connect with kindred spirits.

8. How do you know when it's time to end an unhealthy friendship?

Trust your gut. If a toxic pattern emerges, or a friend's presence mostly undermines your self-esteem, it may be time to reevaluate or even end the relationship. Look for behaviors like manipulation, passive aggression, boundary violations, competitiveness, and repeated betrayals of trust. Have an open talk laying out your concerns and specific changes you need to see. But if their toxic traits remain unchanged, or conversations turn to arguments, it's OK to distance yourself from the friendship. Limit your interactions and invest in relationships that make you feel fulfilled instead. Preserve your peace of mind by leaving negativity behind.

9. Can you reconcile with an old friend after a bad falling out?

In some cases, yes! With time and maturity, people often regret losing touch after a friendship breakup. If you miss your former bestie, suggest meeting just to catch up, no pressure. Keep an open mindset, listen without defensiveness, and validate their feelings. Take responsibility for any hurts you caused. Ask what they need to rebuild trust. Share positive changes and growth you've experienced. If sparks of your former connection reignite, give the friendship another chance. But if they need more space, respect that. Reconciling requires patience, forgiveness and sincerity, but reclaimed friendships can be sweeter than ever.

10. How do you know if someone is just a regular friend, not a best friend?

Trust your gut. Signs a friendship is more surface-level casual include: they only open up superficially, frequently bail on plans, rarely initiate contact, don't get your quirky humor, lack meaningful shared history, don't make you a priority, only want to party or gossip. If efforts to deepen the relationship stall, it may never reach best friend territory and that's OK. Adjust your expectations and level of investment accordingly. Focus your emotional energy on nurturing bonds with more mutual understanding and care instead. Not every friend will be a bestie - learn to appreciate all friendships for what they are.

Living out your most meaningful bonds takes empathy, communication and an open heart. Cherish the special people who've seen you through life's ups and downs. Here's to growing old with best friends by your side!